Notes from an igloo

Hyperbole- noun.

1. Obvious and intentional exaggeration.

2. An extravagant statement or figure of speech not intended to be taken literally, such as “to wait an eternity”.

Just to be clear, that’s not what this is.

Many of my co-workers have unknowingly taken on the role as personal weather forecasters. I’ve found that a couple of the teachers know some English but are too embarrassed to speak with me. Talking about the weather gives both of us a chance to mumble a few words foreign to our native tongues and breaks up the monotony of bows and smiles. Yesterday, I was forewarned that it might be a good idea to take the extra 10 seconds in the morning to put on socks. Tomorrow will be chilly.

By 10:38 am, I’m already on my third cup of tea. There’s still a layer of frost adorning my classroom windows and an unfamiliar tingling sensation gradually numbs my fingers as they brush across the keyboard. Each exhale puffs more smoke than a magic dragon. In the interest of full disclosure, there’s also a good chance that I’m wearing an entire load of laundry right now- long underwear, a long sleeved shirt, two sweaters and a peacoat, stockings, leggings, jeans, a hat from my favorite Aunty Judy, and a scarf. My 5th graders affectionately christen me with a new nickname, Snowman Teacher. Fourth period later changes it to Snowwoman Teacher in the spirit of being politically correct, a fad which apparently extends across the ocean to Korea.

I’m learning that chilly means temporarily relocating to the middle of Siberia. Language barriers can be so inconvenient sometimes.

Friends and family, I know you’re mocking me right now and I want you to know that it’s Ok. But I’ll let you in on a little secret: there’s no heat at my school. Yeah, that’s right. Budget cuts.

The windchill’s 33 right now. Winds are registering at 20 mph.

Baby, it’s cold outside.

And inside, too. I’m certainly not in Florida anymore.

It’s time for another cup of tea.



November 11, 2010. Uncategorized. 1 comment.